HOW TO BE A PIRATE

By Cressida Cowell

Synopsis

When a huge, six-and-a-half-foot floating coffin with the words 'BEWARE! DO NOT OPEN THIS COFFIN' arrives, can you guess what happens next? The Quest to discover the treasure of Hiccup's ancestors begins and Hiccup needs to find it before Alvin the Treacherous gets his hands on it. But when a dragon called the Monstrous Strangulator is thrown into the mix, things are about to get seriously SCARY.

Sample Player

Narrator	David Tennant
Length	3hrs 30mins
Catalogue No.	617521
Publisher	Little Brown Audio; 2013

Other audiobooks by Cressida Cowell

THE DAY OF THE DREADER

The Isle of Berk is being stalked by a deadly sea dragon called the BIG DREADER, fires are ravaging the forests and the Hairy Hooligans are trapped on the island without any food! All except Toothless who has found a stash of eggs that he plans to keep all to himself... But not if the BIG DREADER has anything to do with it!

EMILY BROWN AND THE THING

Emily Brown and her rabbit, Stanley, are trying to sleep. But a Splish-Splosh noise is keeping them awake... It's a Thing! And this Thing just won't go to sleep. Emily Brown and Rabbit try everything, but nothing works. Just what could be the matter?

A HERO'S GUIDE TO DEADLY DRAGONS

With Toothless the dragon at risk of being banished, Hiccup must find a way to steal the Viking's most sacred book at the Meathead Public Library and take on the Hairy Scary Librarian in order to keep his beloved friend from being sent away.

HOW TO BETRAY A DRAGON'S HERO

High up in the treacherous mists of the Murderous Mountains, Hiccup and the Company of the Dragonmark are in hiding. The witch's Spydragons are guarding the shores of Tomorrow - but Hiccup is determined to become King of the Wilderwest. Can Hiccup dodge the dragons and steal the King's Things back from Alvin before the Doomsday of Yule? And is there a traitor in Hiccup's camp who in the end will betray them all?

HOW TO BREAK A DRAGON'S HEART

Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III was an awesome sword-fighter, a dragon-whisperer, and the greatest viking hero who ever lived. But it wasn't always like that. Hiccup's memoirs look back to when Hiccup was just an ordinary boy, and finding it very hard to be a hero. Hiccup must battle Berserks, dodge Scarers, complete the Impossible Task and save Fishlegs from being fed to the Beast! And all while being hunted down by an old enemy with a dark secret about the Lost Throne. What's a hero to do?

HOW TO CHEAT A DRAGON'S CURSE

Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III was an awesome sword-fighter, a dragon-whisperer and the greatest Viking Hero who ever lived. But it wasn't always like that. Hiccup's memoirs look back to when Hiccup was just an ordinary boy, and finding it very hard to be a Hero. Fishlegs has been struck with deadly Vorpentitis. The only cure is rare and almost impossible to find... a potato. But where on Berk will Hiccup find such a thing? Hiccup will have to dodge Sharkworms, battle Doomfangs and outwit crazy Hooligans if he's going to be a Hero... again.

HOW TO FIGHT A DRAGON'S FURY

It is the Doomsday of Yule. At the end of this day, either the humans or the dragons will face extinction. Alvin the Treacherous is about to be crowned the King of the Wilderwest on the island of Tomorrow. His reign of terror will begin with the destruction of dragons everywhere. The fate of the dragon world lies in the hands of one young boy as he stands on the nearby isle of Hero's End with nothing to show, but everything to fight for. Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third's Quest is clear. First he must defeat the Dragon Guardians of Tomorrow and prove that he is in fact the rightful king. And then he faces his final battle: Hiccup must fight the Dragon Furious and end the Rebellion... ALONE.

HOW TO RIDE A DRAGON'S STORM

Trapped on The American Dream II with his friends Fishlegs and Camicazi, Hiccup must ESCAPE the barbarian Norbert the Nutjob, and somehow dodge the cruel Polar-serpents in the icy waters below. If ONLY Hiccup hadn't promised to help the Wanderer slaves on board escape too! HOW will Hiccup save himself, his friends and a hundred and twenty-two Wanderers off a ship WITHOUT their terrifying captors noticing?

HOW TO SEIZE A DRAGON'S JEWEL

When we last left Hiccup things were getting very dark indeed. The Dragon Rebellion has begun. Snotlout is the new Chief of the Hooligan Tribe. Stoick has been banished and given the Slavemark. And Alvin the Treacherous has EIGHT of the King's Lost Things, and has been proclaimed the new King of the Wilderwest... But what can Hiccup do, now all alone and in exile, hunted by both humans and dragons? Can he find the Dragon Jewel, mankind's last and only hope? And if he does, what will he do with it?

HOW TO SPEAK DRAGONESE

When Hiccup's dragon,Toothless, is captured by Romans, only Hiccup and his friend Fishlegs can rescue him. But things get worse, when the Romans steal Hiccup's precious book 'HOW TO SPEAK DRAGONESE' and Hiccup and Fishlegs are taken off to the Fortress of Sinister! Now they must save Toothless AND themselves - but how can they possibly escape?

HOW TO STEAL A DRAGON'S SWORD

Bad times have come to the Archipelago. Ever since the woods of Berserk burned down, it is almost as if the world is cursed. Dragons are starting to revolt against their Masters. The waters have risen, flooding fields and washing whole villages away. But worse still, the wicked witch Excellinor has returned. Can Hiccup find the King's Things and win the sword-fighting contest to stop Alvin the Treacherous from becoming King of the Wilderwest?

HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON

Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third is a smallish Viking with a longish name. Hiccup must lead ten novices in their initiation into the Hairy Hooligan Tribe. They have to train their dragons or be BANISHED from the tribe FOR EVER! But the Seadragonus Giganticus Maximus is stirring and wants to devour every Viking on the Isle of Berk . . .Can Hiccup save the tribe - and become a Hero?

HOW TO TWIST A DRAGON'S TALE

Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III was an awesome sword-fighter, a dragon-whisperer and the greatest Viking Hero who ever lived. But it wasn't always like that. Hiccup's memoirs look back to when Hiccup was just an ordinary boy, and finding it very hard to be a Hero. Someone has stolen the Fire Egg. Now the Volcano on Volcano Island is active and the tremors are hatching the eggs of the Exterminator dragons! Can Hiccup return the Fire Egg to the Volcano, stop the Volcano from erupting, AND save the Tribes from being wiped out by the terrible sword-claws of the Exterminators?

THAT RABBIT BELONGS TO EMILY BROWN

When the Queen steals Emily Brown's favourite toy and erstwhile companion, a toy rabbit called Stanley, Emily sets out to get him back and teach that naughty queen a valuable lesson!

TWICE MAGIC

Witches are creating havoc in the Wildwoods and danger lurks behind every tree trunk. Wish is in possession of a powerful, Magic Spelling Book; Xar has a dangerous Witchstain on his hand. Together they can save the Wildwoods from the curse of the Witches but they are separated by the highest wall imaginable, and time is running out ...

THE WIZARDS OF ONCE

Once there were Wizards, who were Magic, and Warriors, who were not. But Xar, son of the King of Wizards, can't cast a single spell. And Wish, daughter of the Warrior Queen, has a banned magical object of her own. When they collide in the wildwood, on the trail of a deadly witch, it's the start of a grand adventure that just might change the fabric of their worlds.

THE WIZARDS OF ONCE: NEVER AND FOREVER

Xar and Wish are on the final leg of their journey - first stop: the Mines of Unhappiness. Here, starvation is never far away for the magical creatures who toil in its horrible depths. Xar and Wish must escape and fast; Xar needs to take control of his ever-growing Witchstain, and Wish must achieve her destiny. But the Tazzelwurm is in their way, a grotesque monster who threatens to block every entrance. Time is not on their side, but the forests are calling them. Will their combined strength be enough for the biggest quest so far, to defeat the Kingwitch once and for all?